How to buy a record player

My turntable and records
Beautiful, beautiful music
  1. Fall in love with your grandfather’s customised record player and wonderful speakers when you listen to his records as a young kid.

  2. Accidentally walk into The Adelphi in your first few weeks in Singapore and ogle at all the fancy audio equipment. More than half the shops there look like living rooms – replete with comfy sofas to sit back in and enjoy the music. One of them even has guitars hanging on the walls!

  3. Do a bit of research into the cost of said audio equipment. Step back from your computer screen in horror for the next lifetime or so.

  4. Don’t let that stop you from looking at all record players making appearances all over Singapore – even Robinson’s has them!

  5. Make the final payment of your student loan just before Christmas.

  6. ’Tis the season to be jolly! Maybe I should celebrate by gifting myself something. How about a … record player?!

  7. Look at reviews, visit some record stores, and talk to old uncles in the basement of The Adelphi. Look at more reviews while visiting stores. Compare prices on Amazon and be surprised. Visit more stores and keep teetering on making a decision because no one else you know can provide advice on this esoteric hobby.

  8. Finally buy a beautiful one and bring it home.

  9. Don’t forget to buy some records too! It’s okay if the record store guy convinces you to buy an album that you’d never normally listen to because “it sounds so good!”

  10. Agonise over the poor wiring in your house causing your new equipment to sound noisy.

  11. Try many different ways of debugging and fixing it.

  12. Give up and make peace with it.

  13. Buy some more records. Admire the beautiful artwork. Play them. That’s what it’s all about anyway!

  14. Sit back. Close your eyes.

  15. Listen. Listen!

It’s worth mentioning that steps 8, 13, and 15 are really the most crucial ones. In fact I could go so far as to say that all the other steps can be safely ignored. Most importantly, enjoy the music!